The following transcript is provided by YouTube. Mistakes are present. To hear the podcast episode, click HERE.
0:08.0
0:12.2
welcome to Scaling UP! h2o the podcast
where we’re Scaling UP! on knowledge so
0:12.2
0:14.5
we don’t Scaling UP! our systems hi
everybody
0:14.5
0:20.3
Trace Blackmore here your host for
Scaling UP! h2o and folks I know you have
0:20.3
0:25.4
heard me say at time and time again you
as an industrial water trader you have
0:25.4
0:29.6
to get out there and you have to start
attending some of the events that we
0:29.6
0:35.2
have in our industry so you can learn
new things it’s so easy for us
0:35.2
0:40.4
day-to-day to work in the business but
it’s those times where we’re able to
0:40.4
0:47.1
take ourselves out of the business that
really allow us to apply things tenfold
0:47.1
0:51.9
when we get back from a learning
opportunity so when you have these
0:51.9
0:59.6
opportunities to go to and learn that’s
only 50 percent of what you can get from
0:59.6
1:05.0
those events of course the other 50% are
the people that you are going to meet
1:05.0
1:11.1
that can help you with your career now
think about that how many times can you
1:11.1
1:17.9
go somewhere and talk with somebody who
understands exactly what you are talking
1:17.9
1:22.9
about they understand your day-to-day
because they have the same day today
1:22.9
1:28.3
folks get out there and meet those
people then you can exchange information
1:28.3
1:33.6
and they can actually hold you
accountable for goals that you want to
1:33.6
1:37.3
set and vice versa
it’s also a great way especially if
1:37.3
1:41.3
you’re going to a big convention and you
can’t go to every topic that they’re
1:41.3
1:47.4
discussing you can now multiply your
efforts by working with somebody else
1:47.4
1:52.7
and now you can compare notes that is
such a great tip that somebody taught me
1:52.7
1:59.0
years ago and every convention that I go
to I use that one but I also know that
1:59.0
2:05.7
there are people out there that are just
terrified of hearing me say go out there
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2:10.5
and meet strangers trace they’re
strangers for a reason they’re strange
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2:14.2
we don’t want to meet them well know
they’re just like you and chances are
2:14.2
2:20.8
they’re probably as nervous as you are
about meeting you and I tell you when
2:20.8
2:23.5
you get out there
you start meeting people and you start
2:23.5
2:29.1
building your network it is amazing at
how much better you become because now
2:29.1
2:34.1
you have other people that you can ask
questions to but you have to start at
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2:39.1
the same point you have to go up and you
have to introduce yourself now I will
2:39.1
2:43.7
share with the Scaling UP! nation that
that is something that was very
2:43.7
2:49.9
difficult for me it was very difficult
for me to go into a very loud crowded
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2:55.7
room where everybody seemed to know each
other and then for me to go and
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2:59.6
introduce myself when I take assessment
tests
2:59.6
3:05.0
I always come up introverted now when I
discuss my assessment test with somebody
3:05.0
3:10.4
else they always say are you crazy I
would never describe you as introverted
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3:16.8
and there are certain things that I do
that allow me to get over that and talk
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3:21.7
with people and be fun and get
information out of people but that does
3:21.7
3:28.6
not come naturally I really have to gear
myself up to get to that point and I
3:28.6
3:33.0
taught myself that well a great friend
of mine Donna Schrader and she works for
3:33.0
3:38.4
the Texas Tech University Career Center
she’s actually created an entire course
3:38.4
3:44.2
based on what we are talking about right
now so she’s a family friend of mine and
3:44.2
3:48.6
we got to talking over dinner about this
and I thought it would be wonderful for
3:48.6
3:55.9
her to share some of the tips that she’s
come up with to get over being shy so we
3:55.9
4:01.2
can all profit from knowing people
through networking so Scaling UP! nation
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4:07.4
I hope you enjoy my interview with Donna
Schrader my lab partner today is Donna
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4:13.0
Schrader of Texas Tech University how
are you Donna I’m great how are you tray
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4:19.7
I’m doing also great thank you so much
for coming on Scaling UP! h2o and I want
4:19.7
4:23.7
to share with the audience a
conversation that you and I shared at an
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4:29.9
event that you and I are both introverts
and and I think we share that with each
4:29.9
4:36.2
other yes I am an introvert when I first
started talking about being an introvert
4:36.2
4:41.9
my husband said you are not and I
finally figured out okay he thinks
4:41.9
4:47.0
introversion and shyness are the same
thing and I’m not shy but I am
4:47.0
4:53.0
introverted so I want to talk a little
bit about that because when people meet
4:53.0
4:58.0
me the first word that comes to their
mind is not introverted and I do okay in
4:58.0
5:03.5
conversations but it’s much easier for
me to broadcast on this podcast than it
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5:07.8
is to talk to a very small group of
people in the room so what’s the
5:07.8
5:14.1
difference between being introverted and
being shy well introverted people get
5:14.1
5:21.0
their energy from being alone or being
with one other person where extroverts
5:21.0
5:25.9
get their energy from being with lots of
people they like crowds they like noise
5:25.9
5:31.4
they like you know things like concerts
and parties and for introverts we’re
5:31.4
5:36.6
sitting there going oh my goodness how
soon can I leave because this that’s my
5:36.6
5:42.3
energy rather than energizing me now
shyness is something entirely different
5:42.3
5:50.4
it is an a fear of social interaction
and there are ways to overcome being
5:50.4
5:55.9
shot I’m not an expert but there are
ways that you can practice to overcome
5:55.9
6:01.2
shyness introversion is something that
you either are or you are I know that
6:01.2
6:08.2
nowadays people talk about being on and
a continuum and sometimes you’re an
6:08.2
6:12.2
introvert and sometimes you’re an
extrovert and I do recognize that it’s
6:12.2
6:17.6
easier for me in my office with with
working with the students that I do at
6:17.6
6:24.8
the Career Center that I am much more
extroverted in those situations but it’s
6:24.8
6:29.6
because I know what I’m talking about
now we were speaking earlier that you
6:29.6
6:35.0
came up with basically a webinar to
teach some of your students how to
6:35.0
6:39.8
network better how to at least get in
the room and have these conversations do
6:39.8
6:42.2
you mind telling us a little bit about
the process you went through
6:42.2
6:48.1
and why you created that well my webinar
for the students is called networking
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6:54.5
confessions of an introvert and I am an
introvert and I can bet all of the
6:54.5
6:59.7
things that I did wrong through my
career that I want them to learn not to
6:59.7
7:06.8
do so I’m saying you know I would skip
the networking event because I walked by
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7:11.6
and the room was crowded and noisy and
then I tell them you know give them
7:11.6
7:18.5
suggestions for how to manage that noisy
crowded room I could never think of
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7:25.4
things to ask people or talk about so I
give them ways to think about you know
7:25.4
7:30.6
what do you want to know how do you ask
those questions how do you start a
7:30.6
7:38.6
conversation so it’s it’s a concrete
information that will help them
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7:44.8
hopefully learn to network much sooner
than I learned to network well I
7:44.8
7:49.0
encourage people all the time on this
show when they go to a training seminar
7:49.0
7:54.1
or a convention or something like that
to get out there and to not just learn
7:54.1
7:59.7
the material sitting in the seats but to
go to the manglers and is that the right
7:59.7
8:04.4
word you say manglers is that’s how you
say that I’m not really sure I urge
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8:10.8
people to mingle a lot of times they’ll
call it a cocktail hour and the kinds of
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8:16.3
networking events I go to generally
there’s not a lot of alcohol but you
8:16.3
8:22.9
know other places there there may be so
they could call it a cocktail party they
8:22.9
8:27.3
might even call it a meet-and-greet or a
networking event so there’s lots of
8:27.3
8:34.0
different ways to describe it but the
action is always the same you’re walking
8:34.0
8:40.6
into a room to talk to people right and
when you do that you now get to meet
8:40.6
8:46.3
somebody that you didn’t know before and
they might be able to help you in your
8:46.3
8:52.2
career or they might know somebody that
knows somebody so it’s so important to
8:52.2
8:56.5
network
well I think it helps with professional
8:56.5
9:00.2
success
it opens lines of communication that you
9:00.2
9:04.6
might not ever have opened before if you
didn’t walk up and start a conversation
9:04.6
9:11.8
and you know you don’t have to make this
conversation last four hours
9:11.8
9:17.0
it only has the last for a few minutes
to be productive well let’s go through
9:17.0
9:20.6
some of the things that you teach your
students so you encourage them to
9:20.6
9:24.3
network you make sure that they’re out
there meeting people and people are out
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9:28.6
there meeting them but one of the things
that you talked about in your
9:28.6
9:34.7
presentation that I can relate to so
much is I can remember faces I don’t
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9:40.9
have an issue with that but I have such
a big issue with remembering names and I
9:40.9
9:46.4
have had somebody come up to me before
where I’ve said oh it’s so nice to meet
9:46.4
9:50.1
you and they said you’ve met me three
times before and that just obliterated
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9:55.0
me I’m terrified that I’m gonna forget
people’s names do you have any tips for
9:55.0
10:02.7
that well yes one of mine is that I’ve
had to learn the hard way is just ask
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10:08.8
I’m sorry I don’t remember your name can
you remind me and I meet students all
10:08.8
10:14.0
the time and you know I’m thinking this
is the first time I’ve ever seen them
10:14.0
10:18.9
and they may say oh no we’ve talked
before and when I read their resume I go
10:18.9
10:22.8
oh yeah I remember this resume but I
don’t remember the students I don’t
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10:28.3
remember their face or their name so I
have learned to just ask when someone
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10:34.2
knows me and I don’t know them I ask but
there are other things you can do there
10:34.2
10:41.4
are pneumonic devices where you you know
use a phrase to remember their name or
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10:47.2
something about them some people use
rhyme my husband’s a lot better at that
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10:55.4
than I am so bribes are not me but I do
use visuals I will take that name and
10:55.4
11:02.0
create a visual that goes with it so I
can remember for example I know someone
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11:06.6
whose last name is Baldwin and now I
feel like I know them very well but
11:06.6
11:12.3
at the beginning and this person is not
bald but at the beginning of our
11:12.3
11:19.4
relationship I always envisioned a bald
man accepting a pride so bald win and
11:19.4
11:25.3
that I put him in there next to it like
he was the person giving the prize and
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11:30.5
that’s how I remembered his name and his
face and that was very helpful see I
11:30.5
11:34.6
would be worried i’d forget the mnemonic
or whatever the visual was that i try to
11:34.6
11:42.2
remember now there’s no easy way but
I’ve learned to just ask I’m I’m aware
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11:44.5
that we’ve met but I don’t remember your
name
11:44.5
11:50.9
and I a lot of times I’ll say I’m Donna
and they’ll immediately remind me of
11:50.9
11:55.7
their name well that is so simplistic
and I got to tell you that I personally
11:55.7
12:00.0
will avoid that question where I don’t
remember your name can you please tell
12:00.0
12:03.6
it to me again and I’m thinking of ways
well maybe I can introduce them to
12:03.6
12:07.6
somebody else that I do know their name
and they’ll say their name so you’re
12:07.6
12:11.3
right just make it simple and say can
you remind me what your name is
12:11.3
12:19.6
yes yes and and most people don’t
respond negatively to that you know
12:19.6
12:25.9
where well I’m I’m getting older and I
just figure I have gray hair I get a
12:25.9
12:32.9
pass on something but if you’re
20-something good luck ya earned your
12:32.9
12:37.7
gray hair yet you you’re you’re just on
your own bin well Donna earlier I
12:37.7
12:41.4
mentioned that us water treatment folk
we go to a lot of trade shows and
12:41.4
12:45.9
training events and there are
opportunities there for us to get
12:45.9
12:51.0
together for us to meet each other and I
always encourage people to get in those
12:51.0
12:55.1
rooms and to start meeting people
because now they have allies where they
12:55.1
12:58.3
can compare notes on what they’re
learning they can hold them accountable
12:58.3
13:02.0
if they have certain goals all of those
wonderful things that can happen when
13:02.0
13:06.8
you meet new people that do something
like what you do but in some of these
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13:13.2
events we might have 20 different events
that we could possibly attend and that
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13:18.6
can be overwhelming for many what do you
recommend there well one of the things I
13:18.6
13:22.9
like to do is just look at what
available and what’s going to appeal to
13:22.9
13:30.2
me what is going to provide information
that will help me in my future I I want
13:30.2
13:35.3
to learn all the time but something that
I learned are much more useful to me
13:35.3
13:40.7
than others so I’m looking for that
what’s interesting what’s useful and
13:40.7
13:45.5
those kinds of things also if you’re
going with a couple of people from your
13:45.5
13:51.6
company you know you can divide up and
conquer so you know one goes to one
13:51.6
13:55.0
thing one goes to another and then
everybody comes back and talks about it
13:55.0
14:02.0
and so that can be a good way to handle
that but choose what’s going to make you
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14:07.1
what is going to be most productive for
you if you’re going to a conference
14:07.1
14:12.0
you’re spending time and effort and
money and what’s going to be the most
14:12.0
14:18.1
rewarding for you now most likely you
might go to a conference with people you
14:18.1
14:24.5
already know and they might invite you
to several different events that you can
14:24.5
14:29.6
attend now in using what you just said
let’s say instead of going to ten I’m
14:29.6
14:33.6
going to go to three but four people
invited me to different ones how do I
14:33.6
14:39.2
make sure I don’t let that last person
down well and you can be honest and I
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14:46.5
think one of the most important things
is to be able to say no politely okay
14:46.5
14:53.1
I’m sorry I’ve already made a commitment
for that time or that day whatever it is
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14:58.2
but no is a complete sentence and it can
be said politely
14:58.2
15:02.7
you know and then you move on to
something else I hope it goes well for
15:02.7
15:07.9
you thank you for the invitation
whatever it is and then you you know you
15:07.9
15:14.9
move on either in the conversation or
excuse me I need to go now or whatever
15:14.9
15:20.8
Donna why are people so afraid or maybe
I should say why are some people so
15:20.8
15:27.1
afraid of attending networking events is
there psychology behind that well yes
15:27.1
15:33.1
I’m sure there is I read a lot of books
in order to put this webinar together
15:33.1
15:38.3
and I’ve found a lot of good information
about that but a lot of times it’s
15:38.3
15:43.9
simply that with being an introvert
we’re zapped
15:43.9
15:49.1
we’re not energized by big crowds and
loud noises and things like that where
15:49.1
15:55.4
we’re not we’re an extrovert is going to
go into that crowded noisy place and
15:55.4
16:01.9
immediately feel you know energized and
enthusiastic introverts aren’t going to
16:01.9
16:06.5
feel that way
and so one of the things that I tell
16:06.5
16:12.8
people is when you’re confronted with
that big loud noisy room that you’re
16:12.8
16:17.3
walking by thinking everybody in there
knows everybody else and I’m the only
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16:23.2
stranger understand that you’re not the
only stranger and that while there are
16:23.2
16:27.9
groups of people who know each other
well and there’s lots of noise and
16:27.9
16:33.2
talking going on everybody doesn’t know
everybody else and so when I’m
16:33.2
16:39.4
suggesting that you walk into that room
I had a colleague who said Oh what I do
16:39.4
16:45.1
is I walk in and I stick to the edges of
the room I walk around the edges of the
16:45.1
16:50.9
room and he said there’s always going to
be one person at least two standing
16:50.9
16:56.0
alone and that’s the person that I
gravitate to and so you start a
16:56.0
16:59.8
conversation with somebody who’s
standing alone who is probably so
16:59.8
17:03.7
grateful that you came and talked to
them so they didn’t have to start the
17:03.7
17:11.8
conversation so that’s one way that you
get started and then you you move on to
17:11.8
17:16.8
the next person or you take that person
with you to the next single person that
17:16.8
17:22.5
you see and then the three of you are in
a group conversation there’s really good
17:22.5
17:26.9
information about how to start a
conversation how to continue the
17:26.9
17:32.1
conversation and then how to close the
conversation in the webinar well why
17:32.1
17:35.8
don’t we talk about couple of those
things so one I know a lot of people are
17:35.8
17:40.7
scared about small talk and I know you
talk about small talk and you use that
17:40.7
17:45.8
either for or against the the
conversation that you’re trying to have
17:45.8
17:51.2
and then you move into how to direct the
conversation so it doesn’t seem so
17:51.2
17:54.2
awkward so do you mind telling a
Scaling UP! nation a little bit about
17:54.2
17:58.8
that well one of the things I want you
to do is be present
17:58.8
18:03.0
don’t be thinking about oh I’ve got to
go over and talk to this other person
18:03.0
18:08.5
while you’re talking to the person in
front of you and then every conversation
18:08.5
18:14.9
starts with small talk you know hi how
are you how’s the weather but you don’t
18:14.9
18:20.6
have to leave it at that you can ask
more substantive questions and that’s
18:20.6
18:24.7
going to be more interesting to you you
know if all you ever do is talk about
18:24.7
18:29.5
the weather and the food
you’re not really networking so you got
18:29.5
18:36.6
to go deeper than that and then I would
tell you practice practice what you want
18:36.6
18:42.9
to say practice how to move beyond as a
small talk you want to make eye contact
18:42.9
18:49.5
with people you want to smile that makes
you approachable if you’re standing
18:49.5
18:56.2
there with a blank face and you’re not
making eye contact and you’ve got your
18:56.2
19:01.6
arms crossed across your chest then
you’re not approachable and nobody wants
19:01.6
19:05.2
to come and talk to you
so you’ve got to make yourself open to
19:05.2
19:11.3
the new contact so you know keep that in
mind as you’re doing this then ask
19:11.3
19:17.4
open-ended questions if you ask the
question where are you from
19:17.4
19:22.7
you’re going to get more information
than if you ask are you from XYZ company
19:22.7
19:28.3
because that’s a yes or no question and
once they said yes or no where do you go
19:28.3
19:34.6
so open-ended questions a lot of times
when I’m at a conference I will start
19:34.6
19:39.5
with I’m Donna I’m from Texas Tech
University the Career Center where are
19:39.5
19:44.8
you from what brought you to this
conference what are you learning that’s
19:44.8
19:50.4
most important and then you move on to
the more substantive things like we have
19:50.4
19:56.1
how did you get into this career and I
once had someone who was going well I
19:56.1
19:59.5
used to be an English teacher and then
I’m
19:59.5
20:04.0
an entrepreneur well how did you do that
what are the steps you went through
20:04.0
20:09.2
people love to talk about themselves
they also like to give it by so those
20:09.2
20:15.7
are great ways to ask questions and then
express interest you’re going to owe
20:15.7
20:21.3
that so interesting I really am
impressed with that and then you ask
20:21.3
20:26.6
follow-up question Donna do you have
those questions pre-planned before you
20:26.6
20:33.8
go to the networking event um I do I
know that sounds really nerdy and
20:33.8
20:39.4
introverted but I do I plan what I’m
going to say I’ve planned how to open up
20:39.4
20:45.0
a question and I really appreciate it
when someone walks up to me and starts
20:45.0
20:50.9
the conversation because then they’ve
done the heavy lifting as far as I’m
20:50.9
20:55.0
concerned and now we can move on to
those more substantial conversations
20:55.0
21:00.0
those questions and and the answers that
really are going to make people go oh
21:00.0
21:05.2
well that’s really important I want to
know more about that and let’s talk
21:05.2
21:11.8
offline let’s continue this conversation
by email or by phone after the
21:11.8
21:16.2
conference and that happens a lot you
were telling me earlier that you
21:16.2
21:20.3
normally set goals where you say these
are the few things that I want to get
21:20.3
21:25.5
done and once I accomplish those I’m
free to go if I decide to do you mind
21:25.5
21:31.8
sharing those with us oh I don’t mind at
all I set goals for myself I’m going to
21:31.8
21:37.4
exchange three business cards with
someone so that means there are people
21:37.4
21:40.9
in there that maybe I’ve already met
I’ve already exchanged business cards
21:40.9
21:45.6
with them so while I may be pulled
toward them because I’ve already met
21:45.6
21:49.8
them and know something about them I
have to go and talk to new people that I
21:49.8
21:56.8
haven’t met and then I give myself
permission to leave so there are
21:56.8
22:01.7
networking events a lot of times at
conferences that they’re they’ll take
22:01.7
22:05.8
you away from the hotel where the
conference is happening they’ll take you
22:05.8
22:12.6
to a concert or a play or something like
that and those things are really not
22:12.6
22:18.6
and interesting but you know is the
networking event you know all right we
22:18.6
22:23.0
see the play which lasts you know an
hour and now we’re supposed to network
22:23.0
22:28.7
but the networking thing lasts two hours
and the buses aren’t going to take us
22:28.7
22:34.0
back to the conference for two hours
well I plan how I’m going to leave
22:34.0
22:40.5
I plan that I’m going to get a taxi or
I’m going to you know and and that has
22:40.5
22:43.8
to be something that I plan ahead of
time because I have to know the name of
22:43.8
22:49.6
the hotel I’m going back to and the
address for it and about how much money
22:49.6
22:55.0
it’s going to cost me to take that taxi
all of those kinds of things and so
22:55.0
23:01.7
nowadays we have uber and lyft and so
it’s a lot less traumatic because you
23:01.7
23:05.2
know you have to figure out okay how do
you call a taxi and you know if you’re
23:05.2
23:10.9
in the hotel you ask the front desk will
you call me a taxi and they do but if
23:10.9
23:17.7
you’re at another event another venue
you know knowing how to call that taxi
23:17.7
23:22.6
or that uber or whatever it’s going to
take a load off your mind and you get to
23:22.6
23:29.5
decide okay it’s been 45 minutes I can
leave now and and you do that do you
23:29.5
23:34.0
ever worry that you’re not getting your
money’s worth out of where you’re going
23:34.0
23:44.1
– oh I don’t all right so I’m an
employer I send one of my people their
23:44.1
23:48.1
intraverted now they’ve got the extra
pressure that they want to make sure
23:48.1
23:52.4
that I feel that they’re doing
everything they can to the event that I
23:52.4
23:56.1
sent them to so now they’ve got that
added pressure what advice would you
23:56.1
24:01.2
have for them okay well that added
pressure that your employer is expecting
24:01.2
24:07.8
you to come back having networked with
people okay you you exchanged three
24:07.8
24:11.0
business cards the first day you
exchanged three business cards the
24:11.0
24:15.6
second day and on the third day when
it’s probably only about you know half a
24:15.6
24:21.9
day maybe you only change one or two but
that eight or nine business cards and
24:21.9
24:28.1
now when you come back you also will
come back to the office now you’re going
24:28.1
24:34.4
to email those people I really enjoyed
our talk about whatever it was and you
24:34.4
24:38.6
know I you have to have a mutual
exchange
24:38.6
24:44.2
you can’t just exchange business cards
you have to exchange knowledge and
24:44.2
24:49.7
information and I think that you would
really like to know this person I don’t
24:49.7
24:53.5
have their contact information with me
right now
24:53.5
24:58.6
but when I get back to the office I’ll
email it to you and those kinds of email
24:58.6
25:05.2
conversations can be very very helpful
and email or phone conversations are a
25:05.2
25:12.0
lot less scary to me than face-to-face
meeting well that’s great advice well
25:12.0
25:18.5
and I think you know you come back with
enthusiasm I I learned this hey boss I
25:18.5
25:24.9
learned this and this and I made a
connection here and here and that helps
25:24.9
25:28.9
a lot shoot something you and I were
laughing about the last time we saw each
25:28.9
25:35.1
other is my wife accuses me of not
knowing how to close a conversation the
25:35.1
25:38.2
conversation will be over and I keep it
going and going and going and going
25:38.2
25:42.7
you’re very good at that can you give
the Scaling UP! nation some tips on the
25:42.7
25:48.7
right way in the non-offensive way to
close a conversation well and you do
25:48.7
25:55.4
want to be polite and inoffensive you
don’t want to just say okay I’m done
25:55.4
26:00.7
with you and walk away because that
could be a census but think in terms of
26:00.7
26:07.3
what you need to do please excuse me I
need to go speak to my boss or my
26:07.3
26:14.0
coworker or whatever and a lot of times
it’s you know if the buffet is open you
26:14.0
26:19.0
can have your conversation and say
excuse me I’m really enjoyed meeting you
26:19.0
26:23.1
and talking but I’m going to go freshen
my drink or get something to eat and
26:23.1
26:29.5
then another way is to set up you know
can we meet again can we talk tomorrow
26:29.5
26:38.5
over coffee okay one-on-one over coffee
certainly is a lot less nerve-wracking
26:38.5
26:42.7
for me
then that big huge room with all the
26:42.7
26:49.2
people in it it was not talking to you
could perhaps we could meet later and
26:49.2
26:56.5
talk some more or I really did enjoy
what you just said I want to move beyond
26:56.5
27:04.4
that and learn more so you can set up
another another meeting you can set up
27:04.4
27:09.7
an email conversation let me email you
once I get back to the office those
27:09.7
27:15.6
kinds of things but what you don’t want
to do is make the other person feel that
27:15.6
27:20.4
they are inconsequential or that there’s
just one more box you had to check off
27:20.4
27:26.7
and and you and it requires practice
you’re going to need to practice those
27:26.7
27:32.6
things that’s a great point you told me
something that I was very surprised and
27:32.6
27:37.0
I want to explore with you a little bit
you said one of the best ways to get
27:37.0
27:41.7
over your fear of going to an event or
speaking to people at an event is to
27:41.7
27:45.8
actually plan the event yourself and
that just blows my mind can you talk a
27:45.8
27:51.1
little bit around that and how that’s
actually helpful well what I what I
27:51.1
27:55.8
suggest is not planning that huge
networking event but to plan that
27:55.8
28:01.9
smaller networking event you choose a
smaller room conference room a small
28:01.9
28:07.7
meeting room whatever it is and you’re
in charge you’re in charge of who gets
28:07.7
28:13.8
invited you’re in charge of how long it
lasts you’re in charge of the coffee the
28:13.8
28:19.3
juice the bagels or whatever that gets
served so you are making those decisions
28:19.3
28:24.6
and you know you’re the host you greet
people
28:24.6
28:30.5
so you’ve invited them you have a reason
for inviting them maybe you want these
28:30.5
28:35.1
three people to meet the other three
people that you invited and you’re the
28:35.1
28:40.8
one who’s making sure that everybody’s
talking maybe there’s a specific subject
28:40.8
28:45.9
that you want everybody to talk about or
a question you want them to explore but
28:45.9
28:53.5
being in charge you get to decide when
it’s over and that’s wonderful because
28:53.5
28:57.4
we’re gonna meet for 30 minutes or an
hour and then everybody’s going to
28:57.4
29:02.3
disperse and we’ll talk by email and by
phone’s again we’ll continue the
29:02.3
29:07.2
conversation that way it’s different
from going to a conference where that
29:07.2
29:13.0
evening networking is starts at you know
6 o’clock and you know it goes into then
29:13.0
29:16.2
we’re going to have dinner everybody
goes to dinner together and those kinds
29:16.2
29:20.8
of things those were the things that
made me go up to my room and order room
29:20.8
29:27.4
service because I just I I couldn’t I
could not fathom being with all of those
29:27.4
29:35.2
people for 3 or 4 hours without a way to
escape and you know if you’re in charge
29:35.2
29:40.1
you’ve already got your escape plan I
will tell you from my own experience
29:40.1
29:45.8
having a task like you were saying
earlier or being the host or are being
29:45.8
29:50.4
responsible for something that takes my
mind off all those little small things
29:50.4
29:56.3
that we tend to worry about and my issue
isn’t really you know being so
29:56.3
30:01.3
introverted that it and being so shy
that I can’t I can’t go to those events
30:01.3
30:06.9
but it’s hard for me to get started once
I get started I’m fine but it does take
30:06.9
30:11.4
that extra effort to get out there and
to meet that first person and to then go
30:11.4
30:15.7
around the room and make sure that I’m
meeting other people so I want to ask
30:15.7
30:21.0
you there’s a lot that we’ve talked
about here today all helpful if somebody
30:21.0
30:25.5
just joined in right now and they could
just hear one piece of this interview
30:25.5
30:29.2
what’s the one thing that you want to
make sure that the Scaling UP! nation
30:29.2
30:35.3
leaves with oh wow that’s a really
really good question I think the one
30:35.3
30:41.6
thing that everyone needs to know about
networking is that you are not expected
30:41.6
30:47.4
to walk in that room and meet every
person in that room that you can meet
30:47.4
30:55.5
two or three that two or three genuine
conversations and connection is so much
30:55.5
31:01.1
better than you know getting 50 business
cards but not remembering any of those
31:01.1
31:07.8
people or why they were important or if
they’re important to you so I would say
31:07.8
31:14.7
the most important thing is recognizing
that making two or three real genuine
31:14.7
31:20.5
connections is so much more important
than meeting watch that’s great advice
31:20.5
31:25.2
and I also have to say great advice you
said earlier was to have a plan to
31:25.2
31:30.0
reconnect with those people when you got
home to send that email to make that
31:30.0
31:35.0
phone call because now the conversations
still fresh they’re gonna remember you
31:35.0
31:38.5
and you might have that long-lasting
relationship that you wouldn’t had you
31:38.5
31:43.6
not gotten back with them yeah and that
is so important well Donna thank you so
31:43.6
31:47.8
much for coming on and sharing some of
the things that you’ve learned that have
31:47.8
31:52.0
worked so well for you so well that you
actually teach it to others but I
31:52.0
31:55.1
actually have a couple of lightning
round questions for you so I’m not quite
31:55.1
32:01.3
done with you yet if you’re ready okay
all right so now I think you know you
32:01.3
32:05.8
know me well enough that I’m this huge
Back to the Future fan I have a flux
32:05.8
32:12.0
capacitor in my car I think you’ve seen
that yes now we are we are going to get
32:12.0
32:16.9
in the car we’re going to set the flux
capacitor in the time circuits back to
32:16.9
32:22.9
your very first day where you went to
your first networking event you see
32:22.9
32:27.4
yourself standing over there probably on
the outside of the room over there in
32:27.4
32:32.7
the corner you now walk over to yourself
what advice do you give oh it’s okay
32:32.7
32:36.4
you’re gonna be fine
you don’t have to meet every one of
32:36.4
32:40.2
these people and in ten minutes you can
leave and go up to your room
32:40.2
32:47.2
there you go now I know and you creating
this presentation you’ve read a lot of
32:47.2
32:50.3
books around this what are some of the
books that deal with this topic
32:50.3
32:56.1
oh well Susan Cain is an author that I
would recommend she’s written several
32:56.1
33:03.1
books about introversion and Jen
grandmum her book is called secret lives
33:03.1
33:09.6
of introvert the introverts guide to
professional success is by Joyce Sheldon
33:09.6
33:16.0
those are really good book there are a
lot of really good books out there so
33:16.0
33:20.1
choose something that appeals to you if
you want to read
33:20.1
33:25.2
and get more information don’t have to
read every one of these and I’m sure
33:25.2
33:29.1
that there are more books out there that
are equally good I just haven’t read
33:29.1
33:33.2
them I’ll make sure to put those on my
show notes page now Hollywood’s going to
33:33.2
33:36.4
hear about you they’re going to want to
make a movie about Donna Schrader who
33:36.4
33:44.2
plays Donna oh my goodness um well no
one knows this but I’m 4 foot 11 so I
33:44.2
33:50.6
always want to Brooke Shields to play me
because she’s not 4 foot 11 she’s over 6
33:50.6
33:57.8
feet is oh yeah there you go
that yeah that’s me I see myself as
33:57.8
34:04.8
being you know a 6 foot 5 Amazon woman
with a spear so that’s how I see myself
34:04.8
34:09.3
well why not you should see yourself
that way and and I actually see you
34:09.3
34:13.9
right now wearing your t-shirt that you
like to wear to some of these networking
34:13.9
34:17.3
events and you mind sharing with the
Scaling UP! nation what that t-shirt says
34:17.3
34:23.0
I’d love to stay and chat but I’m lying
so I have to make sure to get that in an
34:23.0
34:30.2
extra tall when Brooke plays you so my
last question is you now have the
34:30.2
34:34.8
ability to speak with anybody throughout
history who would it be with and why I
34:34.8
34:40.2
think I would really really like to go
back and talk to Eleanor Roosevelt she
34:40.2
34:47.5
was a woman who was not naturally
extroverted but she had passionate
34:47.5
34:55.9
causes and those causes made her willing
to put herself out there and she didn’t
34:55.9
34:59.8
she didn’t really want to be in politics
and she didn’t really want to be married
34:59.8
35:04.7
to a president but that’s what she got
and she made the most of it
35:04.7
35:10.3
well Donna thank you so much for coming
on Scaling UP! h2o I know that you are
35:10.3
35:15.0
helping people because I’ve seen people
on the outskirts of the room I have been
35:15.0
35:19.7
one of those people and the tips that
you shared with us today certainly would
35:19.7
35:23.0
have helped me and I know they’re gonna
help other people so thank you so much
35:23.0
35:27.7
for that oh you’re welcome thank you for
the opportunity this is been great
35:27.7
35:33.7
nation I hope you were able to get some
tips from Donna I know that what she was
35:33.7
35:38.7
talking about would have been so helpful
for me when I first started out and I
35:38.7
35:42.9
have to say that when she was talking
about some of these tips I was going
35:42.9
35:47.4
back to when I first joined the
association of water technologies now I
35:47.4
35:52.6
remember it was just me I was the only
person in my company at the time and I
35:52.6
35:57.9
flew somewhere and I went to the hotel
and of course right at the hotel there
35:57.9
36:02.3
were people other water treaters that
were greeting each other and hugging
36:02.3
36:07.9
each other and talking to each other in
the lobby and I didn’t know anybody so I
36:07.9
36:15.3
felt like I was the only person in there
that was alone so I went through most of
36:15.3
36:19.7
the convention feeling that way and it
was very difficult because I had that
36:19.7
36:25.6
feeling to get out there and introduce
myself to people but I forced myself to
36:25.6
36:30.9
do it we had some opportunities for us
to network and I gotta tell you the
36:30.9
36:35.8
first night I was very overwhelmed and I
decided that I was going to go back to
36:35.8
36:41.6
my room and do room service and then
later I thought you know what I’m really
36:41.6
36:46.5
missing an opportunity here tomorrow or
actually it was the following week I
36:46.5
36:50.7
would be back in the field servicing and
talking with customers I would be
36:50.7
36:57.0
working in the business and this was my
opportunity to work on my business to
36:57.0
37:03.9
work on me and the next night I forced
myself to go into that crowded loud room
37:03.9
37:10.1
and I started talking with people well I
made myself do that at each and every
37:10.1
37:14.0
function and I started to get to know
people and then when I came back to the
37:14.0
37:18.9
AWT convention the following year I knew
people and I then gravitated to those
37:18.9
37:23.2
people and they said hey it’s so good to
see you let me introduce you to somebody
37:23.2
37:28.2
else and I kept doing that and kept
doing that and eventually I became
37:28.2
37:34.5
involved and with any organization when
you start to do something at least with
37:34.5
37:39.3
me it took the pressure off the fact
that I didn’t know a lot of people I was
37:39.3
37:44.1
actually doing something for a lot of
people and that created the experience
37:44.1
37:46.5
where people would actually come up and
introduce them
37:46.5
37:49.9
selves to me well then I became the
association of Water Technologies
37:49.9
37:57.9
president in 2012 and everybody knew me
because every analyst magazine that came
37:57.9
38:02.1
out had my picture in it and people
would come up and start talking to me as
38:02.1
38:07.7
if we had already met and that’s where
the experience happened that I shared
38:07.7
38:13.1
with Donna and I said you know I it’s
very nice to meet you and this person
38:13.1
38:16.6
said Trace you’ve met me three times and
I gotta tell you I do not remember
38:16.6
38:22.4
meeting them three times and I had met
so many people when the convention was
38:22.4
38:27.2
in Atlanta my hometown and I was also
president that I could remember who I
38:27.2
38:33.0
met and who I didn’t meet and since that
one person said that to me I am just
38:33.0
38:39.2
terrified that somebody’s gonna think
that I forgot them so I will share a tip
38:39.2
38:43.7
and if I have used this on you just know
that it was out of love because I don’t
38:43.7
38:49.0
want to hurt your feelings I from that
date have never said to another soul
38:49.0
38:56.0
that it is nice to meet you I always say
great to see you because that works in
38:56.0
39:01.5
any situation well folks people now come
up to the Association Water Technologies
39:01.5
39:06.0
and they will find me and say they have
a hard time meeting people and I
39:06.0
39:09.2
understand that now whether we’re
talking about the a CWT or we’re talking
39:09.2
39:12.5
about ASHRAE or we’re talking about BOMA
or if more any of those other
39:12.5
39:18.0
organizations out there I promise that
if you work at it and you don’t have to
39:18.0
39:22.6
spend a lot of work at it you just need
to make yourself available to go out
39:22.6
39:27.0
there and to meet a couple of new people
Donna shared with us that her goal was
39:27.0
39:31.9
just to meet three people she was going
to get three business cards and give out
39:31.9
39:36.5
three business cards and then make sure
that she went back later when she got
39:36.5
39:41.1
home and reached out to those people
making sure that she really sealed the
39:41.1
39:48.0
deal on those relationships so for those
of you that are like me start small and
39:48.0
39:54.3
just stick with it some of the tips that
Donna said definitely could help and
39:54.3
39:59.7
remember there are other people out
there that feel the exact same way
39:59.7
40:05.5
you do now a lot of people are very
surprised to hear me talk on this show
40:05.5
40:10.2
but I gotta tell you it is so much
easier for me to speak with the ten
40:10.2
40:14.9
thousand people in the Scaling UP! nation
or to go to a training event and speak
40:14.9
40:20.6
to three hundred people on stage than it
is for me to go up in a group of people
40:20.6
40:26.8
that I do not know and start a
conversation so I can relate if you are
40:26.8
40:30.0
curious about some of the events that
are available to us
40:30.0
40:35.4
water treaters I did a list of all the
things that are coming up that are close
40:35.4
40:40.6
to our industry on our very first
episode of this year so that was episode
40:40.6
40:46.2
67 so go to your favorite podcast player
and look for episode 67 it’s called the
40:46.2
40:53.6
first one of 2019 or you can go online
at Scaling UP! h2o comm forward slash 67
40:53.6
40:59.9
so folks thank you so much for listening
I hope that this can help you or if you
40:59.9
41:03.4
know somebody that’s struggling with
this maybe you can share this with them
41:03.4
41:08.7
that can help them and folks I enjoy
bringing this podcast to you so much so
41:08.7
41:16.4
I will talk to you next week on Scaling UP! h2o